More on Abusive Priest David Nix and the Suicide of Alana Chen

By | December 21, 2019

Yesterday, I received an email from Catholic priest David Nix, who allegedly is responsible for the death by suicide of Alana Chen. In Nix’s email (screen cap below), he demanded that I remove a reference to him on the site’s listing of abusive church leaders. That’s not going to happen, and here’s why.

Before we go further, let’s take a look at what conversion therapy is. In a nutshell, conversion therapy is an effort to change someone’s sexual orientation. Condemned by virtually every health care and psychological association as profoundly damaging to those who are “treated” with it, the practice is illegal in 18 states. Further, it has been condemned by the European Parliament.

So what are the harms caused by conversion therapy? They are myriad, and according to the American Psychological Association, include depression, anxiety, PTSD, suicidal ideation, drug use, and more.

My View on Conversion Therapy

I also should share my theological concerns with conversion therapy. Specifically, I believe it to be an egregious sin, and for various reasons.

In addition to the harm that it causes, I do not believe that God makes mistakes. Sexual orientation appears to me to be just that—an orientation. Indeed, most LGBTQ+ persons, myself included, remember being aware that they were different, long before they understood how they different. In short, they had this awareness well prior to the age of accountability. Thus, to contend that sexual orientation is a sin is itself a sin, for it denies the essential goodness of God’s creation.

So Why Was Nix Allegedly Engaged in Conversion Therapy?

The question of why David Nix allegedly was engaged in conversion therapy seems to me at the heart of this tragic story. Given the risk inherent in the practice, it would seem that Nix would, at a minimum, take a profoundly cautious approach, particularly when, as here, there’s no evidence that Nix has mental health training.

Even more concerning is the claim by Alana’s family that their daughter had been told not to tell her parents. Those familiar with church mandated sexual misconduct training and prevention know that a major warning sign is when a child is told to keep something secret from her parents. Churches should have matters that are confidential; that is healthy and appropriate. But secrets are not. So why on earth would any ethical clergyperson allegedly suggest that she not tell her parents? Something surely is not right when a priest makes this suggestion, and were I Alana’s parents, this in itself would cause me profound concern.

To make matters worse, one wonders why the bishop allegedly ignored communications from Elena’s parents. A pastorally sensitive leader would, at a minimum, want parents to have the opportunity to share and explore their concerns. That’s particularly the case when it involves the wellbeing of children—surely a priority in any healthy religious organization. And when, as bishop, you’re getting communications from a parent regarding the dynamics between their child and a member of the clergy, that should be another sign of serious trouble in the offing. Silence is simply neither appropriate nor helpful.

Nix Lacks Love

As if these issues weren’t enough to cause concern, even the short communication this author received from Nix suggests a painfully incompetent pastoral response, profoundly lacking in emotional IQ. Or love for that matter. Here it is:

Leaving aside grammatical issues, Nix proffers a token nod to the notion that Alana’s death is a tragedy. He then plunges into denouncing what he claims is a lie, never recognizing that his flawed theology and handling of this situation is the real tragedy in this situation, looming even larger than the loss of a promising young person of faith. Nor does he recognize that his tone and tenor are anything but Christlike, which leads me to suspect that Alana’s mother is spot on when she says Nix has been divisive and controversial—a claim that Nix himself appears to acknowledge in his email.

Nix also fails to recognize that his reliance on Alana’s email is a non sequitor. Indeed, it does not prove that his conduct was appropriate; if it illustrates anything at all, it’s that people abused by being subjected to conversion therapy are likely to be remarkably conflicted. On the one hand, they want to please their families and authority figures in their lives. On the other hand, they lack the ability to make the very change that allegedly would accomplish that result. Nix appears unable to process this notion, and indeed his own teaching appear inconsistent with Catholic theology, which does not teach that having homosexual urges is sinful.

Breakdown of the Bishopric

In all of this, the role of the bishop diocesan appears problematic. We know that the diocese has given its blessing to David’s pursuit of life as a solitary. We know too that the diocese has denied engaging in conversion therapy. But if that’s the case, why then did the bishop not respond to Alana’s mother’s concerns long ago?

And why are we not reading about efforts by the clergy involved to get Alana mental health care? It is axiomatic that, unless they are trained as mental health professionals, clergy should not attempt to address mental health issues. With one prior suicide attempt, the challenges Alana faced were not an issue to be taken lightly.

Moreover, Nix’s ugly tone and tenor are not exactly therapeutic. Indeed, my reading of his blog, together with his email, suggests this is a priest who should not be permitted to engage in pastoral care. The bishop diocesan and other ecclesiastical authorities have some serious soul-searching to do, and simply lamenting Alana’s death is not going to cut it.

Looking to the Future

I don’t believe in a literal hell, which is perhaps a good thing, as David Nix would be a lead contender for the role of boiler room foreman during the summer months. But I suspect his conduct will catch up with him in short order. Indeed, as a former attorney, I encourage Alana’s family to consult with a lawyer about possible legal recourse against the Catholic Church and Nix. If nothing else, both may have been negligent if they failed to recommend mental health care for Alana, or if they acted to conceal her condition from her parents, thereby preventing Alana from obtaining needed medical treatment. (I am more than happy to help Alana’s family find an attorney, if they wish to explore this option.)

In the meantime, my advice is this: Nothing about David Nix reminds me of Jesus. If you read his works and concur, then it’s best to cut him and his “ministry” a wide berth. And in meantime, I’d add only that allegedly threatening someone with hell over their sexual orientation is sexual abuse. Just as molesting someone need not involve actual sexual contact, so too does weaponizing their sexual orientation count as sexual abuse.

The good news is that it looks like David will be doing the same for this author. Life is too short to deal with persons like him and his toxic/skewed brand of Christianity.


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Selma Sierra

Unfortunately you fail to recognize the doctrine and teachings of the Catholic Church. It is a mortal sin to accept same sex/homosexual behavior but at the same time, feel love and compassion for those who are struggling with such behavior. As the saying goes, love the sinner but hate the sin. What Fr. Nix did for this young woman was to guide her back to the path of salvation and against the diabolical beliefs that even some in the Church hold. It is not abuse of any type to counsel individuals to resist a confusing behavior of their sexual orientation. Such cultural norms and making them believe it’s ok to be something they aren’t are what is hurting people. To make them think they are someone who they will never become biologically or otherwise is the true definition of abuse. Allowing such behavior is what leads to an individual’s emotional state of confusion, depression and despair. The Doctrine of the Catholic Church is very clear on this matter. Unfortunately, the Church has been infiltrated by homosexual priests who are misleading the flock.

As you are quick to condemn us for our faith, maybe you should look inward and see the harm you do to us for attacking us and abusing us with legal and verbal threats. Our faith is our foundation and when someone like you attack us for our faith, we too feel the emotional pain and abuse from your abuse. Fr. Nix is a faithful priest. We need more like him.


Perhaps you can help us understand how keeping the issue secret from her parents, as Nix allegedly counseled, is healthy or in keeping with Catholic teaching.


Seems to me that this young lady was being torn by two forces. One by her family who said it was ok to do what is not the norm and the other force was to realize the reality of our being. Seems to me that if true (not sure if the priest actually said not to tell her family) the priest was attempting to help the young woman clear up her emotional state by focusing on getting on the right track and not being subjected to the other force that was causing her confusion, etc.

I speak from having experienced suicide within my family (for other reasons) and members who have sexual attraction of same sex. Not a pleasant situation but as I said before, our faith is what guides our values. Those who don’t understand or refuse to accept our beliefs are committing the same acts of abuse that they say we commit.


Hi Selma. While I obviously disagree with your views, I respect both you and your views and welcome your contributions to the blog.

Jackie Martello

Who are you to judge anyone? If you don’t believe in a literal hell, then you haven’t the first idea of who Nix or Jesus is anyway, but you eventually will.


When I hear the un-Christian tone of people like you Ms. Martello, I can only say that I’m not the only person who should be concerned about a literal hell.

And if you learned to interact with others in this manner from David Nix or others of similar ilk, then your comments speak volumes about those individuals as well.

Alberto Alejandre

I know Fr. Dave Nix very well. He is a man full of love and deal and your mischaracterization of him is vile at best. There’s a reason he has the following he has. You judge like a pharisee but without any actual knowledge of the object of your misinformed judgment.